I understand, HerIgo...
I keep hearing myself say the same things in my head that I wonder if I will say to my mom... I just may.
However, I never heard my mom say "Sorry, I love you" either.
Now that you have said it.... Maybe it will make her think? Perhaps it will weigh on her mind when she hears of a pedophile that walks around, shaking hands and smiling with everyone in the congregation, when she must shun you? Maybe?
Now that your 'conscience is clear', if she does reach out to you in the future, maybe you can both agree to keep religion out of the conversation...
best wishes, cha ching